Mackie

Gratitude (2021)

Various

• Chris fixed watering system
• Did not buy MacBook Pro - before new chip
• Extra 3 supplies of dex! 9 per day for months
• Keys left in garage, returned to me (label)
• Did not get Covid from Christina

Mack

• Mack teeth - ok
• Mack lost and found (and Liza not home)

Financial

• Michael: $10,000
• Extra dividends $3K not expecting

Wisdom Trove

• Wordpress security: hacked but no spyware, no account taken over
• Staging slow because of different plugin

Christina

• Wonderful housemate
• Gets on so well with Martin

Finances

• Still got $178 k after buying Macbook ($5500) and Wisdom Trove development

Partition

• Partition is so great. Perfect for work from home.
• Glass partition:  Jo for idea,  3 responses,  cheaper than expect,  installed over flooring,  partition not too wide
• Electricity problem upstairs not partition
• Glass partition great and electrical issue solved in few hours (not from roof, or needing partition out)
• Partition no charge $600

Car

• Getting car out of Bunnings
• Steve and car ($600)
• Car engine overheat (only $200)
• Accident miss in car (so close) 

Priceless moments (2021)

 

Book launch

• Time with Sharon (at Aimee's book launch)
• Sharon witnessed the affirmation
• Sharon: You're such a beautiful man
• Thanks from Aimee and Pip (at book launch)

Dianna

• Talking to Dianna at Eckhart

Wisdom Trove

• Menu and random owl working

Movies

• Dune (with lamb after)
• The Last Duel

Special connections (2021)

Liza

• Pay Mack's teeth

Yogi

• Help Yogi with anxiety and presence.  Be aware of being aware as mantra and remain open.
• "You and Eckhart are my guru"
• "I am very grateful for having you in my life."
• "You've made such a difference.  Thank you."
• That was absolutely magnificent (after discussing surrender and life as a movie)

MDMA weekend with Aimee and Shushann

• Beautiful affirmation

Help Nic with site

• Reference
• Thanks heaps!
• It's looking amazing. Best site out there.
• Hypnosis session

Xenia

• Meet at Milson's Park during lockdown
• The Botanica

Chris

• Openness re anti vax
• Table tennis
• The Botanica and Japanese restaurant

Elna

• Movies (High Ground, aboriginal)
• Sea pool
• New Year's eve Love.Fish restaurant
• Waterfall outing

Spiritual moments (2021)

MDMA experience

• Spent a weekend with Aimee and Shushann in The Blue Mountains where we took MDMA for spiritual purposes.
• It didn't effect me as much as Aimee and Sharon, maybe because of medication I'm on?
• Aimee and Shushann were extremely loving and said some beautiful affirming things to me. I felt deeply appreciated and loved. There was also lots of loving touch.
• I helped Aimee process some past trauma and issues and stood in for her dad and some others.  A little self conscious but Shushann later said it was exactly right what I said.  

Morning gratitude

• I go through a list of things I'm deeply grateful for each morning. It makes me feel very connected to Life.

Talks with Yogi when he was struggling with anxiety

• Yogi was struggling immensely with anxiety over having to find a new home to stay in.  
• We had some amazing conversations and I found myself giving wise advice on how to cope with anxiety, relating to Presence (resting in awareness), letting things be and being the space for emotions. Also how being in our senses reduces anxiety.
• Beautiful feedback from Yogi such as "That was just magnificent"  and "You and Eckhart are my guru."

Wisdom

• Bernardo Kastrup Youtube and course

Challenges (2021)

Finding new housemate

• Leave many months 

Glass partition

• Anxious won't fit, not careful measuring

Electricity

• Electricity problem with partition
• Electricity problem upstairs - cutting out

Car

• Overheating

Mack and Liza

• Kidneys
• Mack to vet every 4 - 6 weeks

Nic and site

• Feeling not up to it
• Wanting to radically change my first go (logo too)

Wisdom Trove

• SEO issues
• Gavin launch damp squid - so much time
• Security issues and hack

Branding suggestion for Nic's new business

I'm building a web site for my friend, Nic. Here is my suggested brand concept.

Online quizzes (during lockdown)

Shushann and Lydia walk

 

Playing table tennis with Chris

That's a ball in his drink! 

Mack loves Martin

 

Milson's Park with Xenia

Mack celebrating Liza's birthday with Jack Russell whisky!

 

Sam 21st birthday

 Hi there dear Sam

Happy happy 21st birthday. I feels like only yesterday I came to South Africa to see my beautiful baby niece. How wonderful it’s been to see you grow up into the amazing, extraordinary woman you are today - so full of intelligence, depth and fun. May the next stage of your life journey bring you a treasure trove of love, wonder, adventure and joy. We all love you so much.   Ps. Hope your party last night was amazing! I did so love the video Jo made for you. 

G

Mackie

Dear Mackie at home and at the park.

Beautiful article from Shushan that I helped inspire

Hi there dear Graeme

Here is the article that I’m planning to post out on Tuesday. Please let me know if there is anything that feels uncomfortable for you.

Looking forward to walking and catching up

Love Shushann

 

He Offered To Do The Dishes..

I’ve been fortunate enough to have had some good hearted, kind, caring men in my life who have supported me in various ways through their acts of service. These include my accountant, my mechanic, various handymen and a couple of male friends. One particular male friend I would describe as a soul brother. I have really appreciated his capacity for presence, insightful conversation, playful humour as well as thoughtful affirmation and encouragement when I’ve needed it.

But I would describe his male superpower as his acts of service. These are caring things he has done for me that have made my life easier.  This soul brother has been a wonderful model of the high masculine for myself as well as other female friends that have loved and appreciated his company and friendship. 

Giving and Receiving

My soul brother's presence and modelling has created a valuable template for me in my own healing journey around men. His masculine quality of Giving has taught me step into my feminine quality of Receiving. To do so I've had to learn to trust and open my heart and allow myself to feel my own vulnerability and need. We can spend a lot of our life pretending we don’t need others or anything.  This can often lead to isolation and exhaustion. There is an art in receiving things graciously. Allowing the gift of being given-to, to land in our hearts with that feeling of acceptance and worthiness and without feeling we must give something back. There is something special about the acceptance of being given to that is also an affirmation, a gift to the giver.

There is a certain honour in my soulful brother’s actions that feels old fashioned in the sense that they carry with them a sense of safety, protectiveness and genuine care without any obligation.  Women’s instinctive desire to feel protected by a man hasn’t gone away. It’s a hard-wired instinct and it is difficult to ignore for even the most independent, strong women amongst us.

Safety in Relationships

Safety is one of the key elements that women seek in their relationship with men. Perhaps this is part of our tuning into a collective consciousness where almost 1 in 5 women (18%) and 1 in 20 men (4.7%) have experienced sexual violence (sexual assault and/or threats) since the age of 15.  And globally, one out of three women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime.

The trust and safety that has been built in my relationship with this particular male friend has been built on a foundation of small but consistent acts of kindness, care and service over the time of our friendship. These are qualities that I endeavour to cultivate in myself in my relationships. The consistency is key in building trust. Walking our talk when we stand for integrity.

 

I'll Do The Dishes...

I remember last Christmas I had a lovely gathering of friends over for a shared lunch. Just at a point after lunch where I felt I was flagging, my soul brother got up from the table and quietly said “I’ll do the dishes” in that matter of fact way.  I felt a momentary impulse to say I'd do them later, but chose instead to simply graciously accept. As he started moving back and forth from the table to the kitchen I could feel myself relaxing. I felt an incredible wellness wash over me, that I didn’t have to ask or to carry on doing things on my own. There was help and mostly that it was given without having to ask. That felt such a blessing.

What has been liberating for me in having this soul brother is to engage in our friendship and emotional intimacy without the complication of sex. We haven't tried to label it or change it, but to simply appreciate what is there without any expectation of something more or less. Many of us know what it is like to jump too quickly into a sexual relationship that carries no intimacy.

Are you waiting for the evolved partner?

I know many of us as women can get caught up in our complaints about the many shortcomings of men around us. We are waiting for that evolved male partner or even friend to turn up. But what if we simply started to explore this as our own soul journey of integration rather than waiting. What qualities of the high masculine are you curious about in your life? Would like more of in your life? Are there men around you who are role models for you around this?  And how do these qualities live in you? Or not?   

Love and blessings

Shushann

Visit with Jilly

 

Lunch with Jane and Xenia

 

Watson's Bay with Gavin and Srini

Macbook Pro 14 inch with M1 Max chip

Apple has started creating it's own chips and they are incredibly powerful in terms of speed and battery life.  This felt like the perfect opportunity to upgrade my laptop. With its 64gb of Ram, it's lightning fast. I'm so happy with it.  I gave my old Macbook Pro that I bought in 2015 to Chris. He was delighted.

The Ultimate Experience

 

I Am

I am unremitting joy. I am utter despair.

I am languid peace. I am chaotic turmoil.

I am abundant generosity. I am insatiable greed.

I am adoring love. I am heartless indifference.

I am pure innocence. I am vulgar sleaze.

I am cocksure swagger. I am fearful doubt.

I am a shy smile.  I am a vicious snarl.

I am a soaring symphony. I am a fearful din.

I am a scurrying ant.  I am a motionless sloth.

I am a soaring eagle.  I am a crawling worm.

I am a gargantuan tree.  I am a tiny flower.

I am an omnipotent king.  I am a cowering subject.

I am an athletic champion.  I am a lazy slob.

I am a holy saint.  I am an atrocious tyrant.

I am an impenetrable jungle.  I am a withered land.

I am a  mountain peak.  I am a gaping abyss.

I am a blazing sun.  I am a planet of ice.

I am an endless galaxy.  I am a grain of sand.

I am a radiant light.  I am the darkest night.

I am this.  I am that.

I am here.  I am there.

I am him.  I am her.

I am you.  I am me.

I am the collective experience of all these things

and many, many more;

a kaleidoscope of a quintillion different perceptions

and I am that which makes experiencing possible.

I am the Eternal Subject

yet I also take the form of every object.

I Am All That Is.

I Am all Knowing.

I Am all Being.

I Am.

I Am.

I Am.

Written: 2021

Right now

Right now I Am…

   soaring high on outstretched wings

   opening my petals to the morning sun

   scurrying through a termite cathedral

  spinning an intricate web of silk

   trumpeting through an upturned trunk

   laying eggs in a little pond

   picking nits from my lover’s fur

   probing the damp soil with my spindly roots

   singing a duet through a twittering beak

   galloping along on mud-spattered hooves

   surfing waves with gleeful squeaks

   gazing out meditatively with large, luminous eyes

   stretching my branches up and out into the vast, open sky

   smelling for truffles with my sensitive, pink snout

   probing a hole in the rocks with a nimble tentacle

   paddling along a stream with powerful kicks

   hungrily sucking warm milk from my mother’s teat

   searching the ocean bed in search of a larger shell to call home

   charging headlong into the horns of another with a mighty clash

   licking my paws with a raspy tongue

   wriggling this way and that to shed my scaly skin

   breathing in air through my damp, permeable membrane

   bobbing up and down in an intricate dance with my life-long mate

   cutting the water with my dorsal fin

   rising up on thrusting haunches in orgasmic release

   stalking stealthily in pursuit of unsuspecting prey

   enclosing my young one in a protective embrace of flippers and feet

   staring patiently at the water with my rapier like bill ready to strike

   wagging my tail in unrestrained welcome

   sharing a belly-laugh with a beloved friend

   staring in wonder at a crimson sunset

   shedding grief-stricken tears at an untimely loss

   typing this poem with clumsy fingers and an open heart

All these things I, the Cosmic Mind,  experience in the timeless Now

and a quintillion quintillion more things

across countless different worlds and dimensions.

All experiences past, present, and future

exploding forth as pure perception from the Singularity I Am,

the Infinite Awareness I Am,

in a great, exultant cosmic bang,

creating the ultimate immersive, experiential work of art,

wondrous and beautiful,

epic and profound,

beyond all imagination.

Written: 2021

Embrace experience

Gaze at beauty like tomorrow you’ll suddenly find yourself blind.

Listen to music and birds singing like tomorrow you’ll be deaf.

Eat a meal like tomorrow your taste buds will dissolve and be gone.

Smell a flower like tomorrow your nose will be eternally blocked.

Make love like tomorrow you’ll lose all sense of touch.

Express love like tomorrow like you’ll be struck dumb and illiterate.

Reminisce like tomorrow all your memories will be lost.

Written: 2021

Royal National Park with Srini

The beach to watch the red moon and eclipse

 

Chris's Toastmaster speeches

Attitude at Altitude

Dreams Are For Everyone

Polished

In Search Of My Father 

Wherever I Lay My Hat

Problems Are Just Solutions That Haven't Been Found Yet 

Catch Up If You Can 

Speak All You Can

 

Press Conference (Macquarie Student)

War Story

The Race

Visiting Christina in Carcoar with Chris

A wonderful 3 days with Christina playing table tennis, taking the dogs for walks in the invigorating winter chill and sipping tea by the fire.  The great commentary in the video above is courtesy of Chris. We got so good, we eventually put up the net.

Mackie

 

High tea at Vaucluse House