Egypt (4-26 August 1997)

Nuweyba, Dahab, Luxor, Aswan, Cairo

Post cards, letters and photos from 3 weeks backing solo in Egypt. 

Places visited

Letter home

Dear Mum, Gran, Gramps, Jo and Ant

Hi there! I hope this letter gets to you because the Egyptian postal service is notoriously suspect! Right now I’m in the Sinai desert on the coast of the Gulf of Aquaba (part of the Red Sea). I’m staying at an extremely rustic camp with Robinson Crusoe style grass huts, very basic toilets and nothing else for miles around. A wonderful spot to relax after my hurly burly trip through Israel and Jordan. It gets rather hot here during the day (understatement of the Century!) so we spend our time lazing in the shade with occasional splashes in the sea – which is a deliciously refreshing temperature. There is a huge coral reef here so there is lots to explore. I’m planning to explore the Sinai for at least a week; the scenery is awesome and it’s so cheap. Accommodation is costing me R5 a night. Some people come here for a day or two and end up staying for 6 months. They’re the ones with long beards and smelly armpits. Not for me though – I cannot wait to get to the Nile Valley to see ancient pyramids and temples. From here I intend to make my way to Aswan, then catch a Felucca (Egyptian boat) up the Nile to Luxor (apparently this is an awesome experience) then head north to Cairo. I’d also like to explore some of the desert oases before flying to Athens on 26th August. Three weeks in Greece, then I meet Ally in Istanbul Turkey.

The Middle East has been a real experience – so different from travelling in Europe. The first thing that strikes you is the climate – it’s very hot. In Eilat and Aquaba we experienced temperatures well into 40ºC. There are advantages – one is able to travel really light with just a pair of shorts and a few T shirts (drying washed clothes is an instantaneous affair) – and accommodation is always cheap because all you need is a mattress on the roof (I’ve become addicted to sleeping under the stars).

After Jordan we made our way into Egypt. To do so we had to use a ferry across the Red Sea. What an experience it was. Two hours late and crammed so tight with locals there was hardly a place to sit on the open deck –not to mention the problem of the beating sun on the three hour crossing. Drank lots of water. After another two hours in Egyptian customs (you would not believe how inefficient and slow the Egyptian “wheels” turn), we were free to begin our hedonistic lifestyle on the Red Sea.

I stayed in Nuweyba for a week – really relaxing and quiet with awesome coral reefs. Highlights included swimming with a huge turtle and wild dolphin. Mark left for Cairo – he couldn’t stand the quiet but I soon became really good friends with a wonderful girl from Peru and guy from Holland. We were all really sad to say goodbye when the week was up.
Then to Darhab, also on the Red Sea, where hundreds of young people come to chill out and have fun. The whole place had a 60’s “free” feel and was very festive. The coral reef was spectacular here too – a temporary diversion from all the partying. For some exercise we climbed to the top of Mount Sinai (resisting the temptation to go by camel). We spent the night on top (very cold, but fantastic stars in the night sky). The sunrise was also awesome.

From the Sinai I caught a boat to Hurgada – a mammoth 5-hour journey of buffeting waves. I thought I was going to die of seasickness. From there, an epic bus ride to Aswan to see the famous temple of Abu Simbel and Philae. The Aswan High Dam was a disappointment – I was expecting a huge wall but it wasn’t to be. However seeing the Nile and walking along it was exciting. IN Aswan I met three wonderful girls from Germany and we travelled together for five days. They didn’t speak much English so communication was a real challenge and often hilariously funny. My German has certainly come a long way.

Then another highlight of my trip – I sailed along the Nile to Edfu on a Felucca (a traditional Egyptian sailing boat). The trip took three days and provided glorious scenery and relaxation. Our captain was a really friendly local who made us laugh constantly and my four fellow passengers were also great fun. On the second night, we stopped off at our captain’s village to meet his wife and kids (all 8 of them) and enjoy a simple but delicious Egyptian meal. Food in Egypt is tasty and cheap –but you’ve got to be careful of what and where you eat. Lots of my travelling companions have come down with nasty tummy problems – but I’ve been fine so far (touch wood). Egypt is good training ground for India – where everyone gets sick.

After three lazy days of watching the banks of the Nile goby (and eating, sleeping and temple watching) we arrived at Edfu. From there to Luxor – home of the famous “Valley of the Kings” where the ancient Egyptians buried their Pharaoh in beautiful, colourful tombs carved in the mountain. Lots more impressive ancient temples, too. After bingeing on all the sights, I caught the train (surprisingly luxurious for Egypt) to Cairo. What a mad city! 20,000,000 people living close together, all Egyptians drive like maniacs and love hooting their horns. The only way to escape the noise is to stay in hotels at least 10 floors up. However, it is wonderfully vibrant with teeming shops and markets and lots of interesting sights including the awesome pyramids which have to be seen to be believed. They are huge! The Egyptian museums also provided hours and hours of interest.

Tomorrow I leave Cairo and fly to Athens. I’ve heard lots of good reports about Greece and cannot wait to see it.

So that’s a quick summary of my Middle East travels. It’s been absolutely fantastic – I never realised life could be this exhilarating. I’ve made some wonderful friends and am fast collecting addresses from all over the world.

I’m sorry that my correspondence has been so frugal while I’ve been in Egypt – but I’ve been hearing so many sad tales about the postal service that I decided to rather keep my postcards and send them from Greece. I hope Ally gave you the message that I was alive and kicking.

I hope you guys are well. I think about you all the time on my travels. There are so many things about home that I miss. I’ll try and phone you as soon as I get to Athens.



From Post Cards


Dahab

• I spent close to two weeks in the Sinai – exploring the desert and the coral reefs. Nuweiba, the first town I stayed in was rustic and quiet (very relaxing). Then I moved to Dahab, full of young backpackers and rave-up parties all night. It was great experiencing both worlds.

The Wonders of the Red Sea

• I spent many fascinating hours snorkelling in the coral reefs of the Red Sea. Spiritual stuff – teeming with brightly coloured fish and sea plants. My best moments were swimming with a huge turtle and then later, a friendly dolphin that loved the company of people.

St Catherine

• I climbed all the way to the top of Mt Sinai (a long way!) then slept the night on the top after watching the sunset. Then after a very chilly night, we watched the sunrise and made our way down to the Monastery of St Catherine’s which has a room full of the skulls of dead monks who worked in the monastery through the ages.

Karnak

• Karnak is one of the mediumst remaining temples in the world and very impressive indeed with towering pillars and walks. Just to walk round it takes an hour. Just about every bit of rock making up he temple is covered in hieroglyphics – some of it rather x rated. Karnak is situated in Luxor, a town on the Nile in central Egypt.

The Temple of Queen Hatchepsut

• Here is another temple that really impressed me. As you can see, temples look very different at night when they are lit up. It’s great walking around temples at night, not just because of the atmosphere, but also because you don’t have to contend with the sweltering sun. One advantage though of being in Egypt in the hot summer is that there are less tourists.

Aswan

• Aswan is a beautiful place – with wonderfully shady walks along the Nile. Thank god for the shade because it can reach 50ºC here. From Aswan we climbed onto a Felucca (traditional sailing boat) and spent three lazy days sailing along the Nile – exploring islands and temples along the way. We ended up in Edfu and then caught a bus to Luxor.

Valley of the Kings

• Visiting the pharaoh’s tombs in the Valley of the Kings was one of my biggest highlights. The tombs are built deep into the mountainside (like caves) and the walls are beautifully painted in fresh, bright coloured pictures (like the one shown on the postcard). The entrances to the tombs were originally hidden to deter thieves.
• We went through hell to get here, a cramped three and a half hour bus journey through the scorching desert, but it was well worth it. When the Aswan dam was built, this temple was in danger of being swallowed by the rising waters, so organisations from across the world moved it – brick by brick, to a new site (an awe inspiring achievement).

The Temple of Philae

• This is one of the stunning temples I visited in Aswan. Yet another temple that they had to move brick by brick when the Aswan dam was built. The temple is now situated on an island in the middle of the Aswan dam. Not surprisingly, the Egyptians charge you a fortune to visit by boat – you really have to be careful in Egypt or you can get really ripped off. Whenever you want to buy something in Egypt, the Egyptians will tell you an exorbitant price and then you have to haggle them down. It’s part of the culture here.

Cairo – The Mehemet Ali Mosque

• The Mosques in Cairo are absolutely beautiful, and very old. Many date back to 500AD. I spent a spiritual morning in the Mehmet Ali Mosque feasting my eyes on its stunning architecture and colourful interior. I’ve developed a much stronger understanding of the Muslim religion in the Middle East. It’s great to explore other cultures. It makes you think about things differently.

Cairo

• Cairo is a mad city. 20 million people rushing around frantically like ants. Noisy, everyone continually hoots their car horns, chaotic, smelly – but fascinating. We spent hours just walking the streets, mesmerised by all the goings on. Cairo has enormous markets where you can buy anything real cheap. In all, a great place to visit (but not stay too long!).

Giza

• Please excuse the kitsch postcard – it was the only one of the pyramids I could find. Postcards in Egypt leave a lot to be desired! The pyramids and sphinx at Giza were fantastic. You wouldn’t believe the size of them. I explored the area on horseback (great fun) and went right deep inside the Great Pyramid – a very eerie experience. Sunset over the area was unforgettable – miraculously we were nearly the only tourists there. It’s great to have finally seen the 7th wonder of the ancient world.

Cairo – the Egyptian Museum

• The Egyptian Museum in Cairo was very impressive – a huge building crammed with ancient relics. Tutankhamen’s treasure, including solid gold masks and statues were awe-inspiring. They certainly buried their kings in style! Another highlight was the Mummy Room – full of grinning and shrivelled up bodies of the Great Pharaohs of old. Macabre but fascinating.
• This map will give you a basic idea of my trip around Egypt. It was a fascinating country and I made many good friends. My next adventure is Greece. I fly into Athens tomorrow.

Travel Notes


Nuweyba

• No wonder the Jews were in the wilderness for 40 years - they discovered the Sinai, camped on the Red Sea and smoked grass with the Bedouins all day.
• Arrive in Nuweyba, at rustic camp with grass huts and gorgeous beach. We have met some quiet Check girls. The lazy life begins. Sleep on beach to sound of lapping waves.
  Tues 5, lazy day resting and swimming. Mark like a bear with soar head - to slow for him. He has become hyper critical of so much and I feel all self conscious that he is judging everything I say. Life consists of sleeping, eating and swimming.
• Wed 6, another relaxing day. Snorkel on the beautiful reef. Meet South American girl studying "Grunberg technique" in Israel. Beautiful, radiant person - spontaneous and warm.
• Thurs 7, Mark and Stefan leave early. Ariele and I chat. Fantastic snorkeling.
• Fri 8, more snorkeling where I see a turtle - spiritual stuff. Go into town to Dr Sheesh kebab for fantastic pancake and breakfast. Meet our new resident, Dutch actor called "Case". Warm and funny, he is manager of a theatre company. Laze around and go to town for great evening meal at Dr Sheesh. Make friends everywhere we go. Back to camp for joints and fun with camp people (Looka, Maurice). I learn to smoke properly.
• Sat 9, I find someone has been into my sacred wallet and taken my big notes, including my dollars ($300) and travellors cheques.
• Swim with local dolphin - amazing. Scores of swimmers trying to get a touch. With my flippers, I can keep up really well.
• Try to catch bus to Dahab but never arrive. To Chinese restaurant with Case and Ariele - delicious beer. Case has really made an impression.

Dahab

• Sun 10, I go to Dahab. Hot concrete room like an oven. Very touristy but food good. Swim at Blue Hole, 100 m deep hole in shallow coral. Spiritual world of colour and abundant life. See Scorpion and Rock Fish. At 11 pm, I climb Mount Sinai to watch sunrise.
• Mon 11, climb dow and visit St Catherines Monastery. Really tired! Read "All that Remains" - serial killer mystery.
• Tues 12, back to Blue Hole, then eat out on town with friendly british group. Dahab looks good at night with thousands of lights.
• Impressions - bleak drown desert with multi coloured world under sea, slow motion customs officials, buses that never arrive, bus looks for petrol at 11 pm, driving 100 km off route to get it.

Luxor

• Wed 13, catch bus and boat to Hurdada.
• Thurs 14, I allow myself to be forced to hasty taxi experience. To Karnak Temple, Luxor Temple (by night light - fantastic) Get lost travelors cheques but not resolved. Buy illegal alcohol for hotel. Fuluca to Banana Island with Australian - no wind so motor boat pulls us with 5 other boats.
• Fri 15, to West Bank - Valley of Kings (Ramses IV no 2, Ramses VI - amazing) Also to Temple of Ramses III (Habu) and Hatsheput.

Aswan

• Catch train to Aswan, meeting three wonderful girls from E Germany. (Steffi, Danie, Anya).
• Sat 16, walk round city markets, felucca ride to Kitchener Island (botanical island), Elephant Island (museum + temple). Hotel Norhaan is great. Meet Liverpool guy and his Hong Kong wife for supper at Emy's restaurant. Inspiring - they are well over 30 and traveling.
• Sun 17, long trip to Abu Simbel. Eerie desert scenes. Temple amazing, especially considering been moved block by block to new place when dam built. Built into huge mountain which later find is man made - go into center where like space set.
• Temple of Philae on island of Aswan - lose my temper getting a boat. Chill out.
• Unimpressive Aswan dam. Supper with German girls. They have made me feels so welcome - clicked really well.

Felucca trip

• Mon 18, I begin my wonderful felucca trip with Mohammed, warm and friendly. Fello trippers are Keith (British photographer), Midge (German / English marine biology with confused accent) and two german girls (Connie and Ellen). Lazy watching the lush Nile go by - smoking grass. Two rats on board. Washes plates in Nile. Lots of tea. Zig zag along on strong wind. My soul relaxes and soars.
• Tues 19, early morning temple visit, then day of sailing to Mohammed's house in Edfu. Very poor and basic but warm hospitality and lots of filling supper. Excited children everywhere. Smoke Shisha till late, then sleep on boat. I feel absolutely wonderful - must find more experiences like this.

Luxor revisited

• Wed 20, visit Edfu Temple. Then to New Everest Hotel in Luxor. Walk around town with Merge. Awful supper of Sheesh Kebab. Only eat at recommended redtaurants! Night of drinking cinzanno and smoking grass with felucca girls and a smooth, fuckaholic local.
  I have been traveling now for over 4 months. Learned a lot. Have realised experiences and nature are far more important than seeing lots of sights. Do really NB things (eg pyramids), then look beyond the beaten track. Do what is good for soul.
• Impressions: Hassling everywhere. Come into my shop, baksheesh, inflated prices that have to haggle for. Tooting horns, flash lights when pass oncoming car, use both lanes. Egypt is a narrow strip of green in a hot desert, if the Aswan breaks, the whole country will be swamped. Date trees everwhere. Eating always a bit precarious - will I get the runs, tummy cramps, constipation?

Cairo

• Thurs 21, catch train to Cairo. Meet wonderful German chap (Marcus) with gorgeous sense of fun and enthusiasm. Travel Cairo together. Stay at Sun Hotel, smoke grass on roof.
• Fri 22, to awesome Pyramids at Giza. Ripped off by horse rental company but fun galloping. Crawl through inside of 2nd pyramid and walk round Great Pyramid. Walk round Cairo - mad, bustling, tooting city. Great cheap food (noodle dish eaten by locals - Kushuri). Buy vodca from Duty Free and get drunk with Merge, Marcus and Tom etc. on the roof. The security guard and local roof dweller get drunk with us. What a bond alcohol can make!
• Story: Eed. Family in Cairo playing wth goat. Kicking ball against it. Girls playing with hair. Suddenly arrive - father hacking at it - son kicking head round lawn. Put hands in blood and put on walls. All thru town can hear bleating animals. Sheep killed on cars. Turkey neck broken.
• Sat 23, see the Egyptian Museum - King Tutenkamen's treasures awesome. To think he was a small king! Solid gold masks within masks in tomb in tomb (4x). Mummy room very eerie - Egypt's Greats exposed in death. Walk to Bazaar and old Cairo - miles later catch taxi home. Marcus is wonderful - zestful enthusiasm completely infectious.
• Sun 24, to Citadel to see beautiful Muhammed Ali mosque (spiritual, quiet sit inside, then city of Dead - massive cemetary of graves with people living too. Tom came with us - hyper stressed and negative but nice company.
• I'm so enjoying traveling - haven't been lonely for more than a day.
• Mon 25, quiet day at hotel. Tom going mad with impatience to get out of Egypt. Afternoon return to Giza Pyramids to walk round and watch sun set. Fantastic. Shitty ride on horse. Meet great couple (Dutch guy and his Peruvian girlfriend.) Walked around town together getting on famously. Stay awake till early morning.
• Impresions: Mad roads in Cairo, driving in taxi like an Arcade game, hooting. Chap cycling in street with huge box of bread on his head. Kushuri noodles - local restaurant where we gain respect of locals by pouring on the super hot sauce. Locals jump onto moving buses packed like sardines.
• Hassle - always want something - "My sisters birthday tomorrow, buy me drink from Duty Free shop. Come visit my factory. Want to eat something. You my friend. For you - special price."

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Next stop

• Greece

Jordan (27 July-4 August 1997)

Petra, Amman

Post cards, letters and photos from my week of solo backpacking in Jordan.

Places visited

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From Post Cards


Jordan

• Petra in Jordan is without doubt one of the highlights of my trip so far. Huge temples and tombs carved out of the sheer cliff face – a massive ancient city that was forgotten and lost for 700 years till its discovery in the 1800’s. It was used as the setting for Indiana Jones (the movie).
• Another scene from Petra. Amazing to think it was carved 1500 years ago. The desert landscape with deep canyons everywhere is as impressive as the monuments themselves. I have spent two unforgettable days hiking the area – one could spend months here and not get bored.

The Siq, Petra

• Yet another photo that shows the awesome scenery of Petra – deep canyons that one can explore forever and a day. Steep climbs up the side of the canyon made for unbelievable views over the entire city and beyond.

Amman Roman Theatre

• I spend three days in Amman, the capital of Jordan – a medium, hustling Arab city with lots to see and eat and experience. The people here are unbelievably friendly. Often they even insist on paying our bus fare and offering us free food. Smiles and “welcome to Jordan” wherever we go. So cheap too – a three course meal costs R10!

Jerash Triumphal Arch

• Jerash is the mediumst ancient Roman ruins of a provincial city in the world and was very impressive indeed. There is an international arts festival here at the moment – another case of excellent (lucky!) timing. The huge ancient theatre was a highlight – the acoustics are brilliant even after all these years. I got to try out my “Friends, Romans and Countrymen” speech I learned back at school.

The Oval Plazza – Jerash

• Another view of Jerash. The Jordanians are busy restoring the city to its former glory. I cannot believe how prolific the Romans were – no matter where they travel in the world, there seems to be Roman ruins. I must say my Latin comes in very handy for translating all the inscriptions.

St George Church at Madaba

• We went to Madaba especially to see the mosaic on the floor of St George’s Church. It is a huge map of Palestine, laid down in the 6th Century – nearly 1500 years ago. The part of the map shown here is Jerusalem. The amazing thing is that some of the buildings in the map still exist. I should know, I visited them. E.g. Church of the Holy Sepulchre.

Qusair Amra, Jordan

• From Amman we travelled into the desert to explore a serious of castles out in the middle of nowhere. Public transport was non existent so we hitched. Anywhere else we may have struggled – but not in Jordan. We got a lift in a huge truck with an ultra friendly chap who wanted to hear our life stories even though he could hardly speak a word of English.

Karak

• The highlight of Karak was this enormous Crusader Castle. The views of the desert from the top were great and there was an exciting network of underground chambers and tunnels to explore. At one time, the Crusaders used to throw their hapless captives off the walls of the castle to their deaths – 450 metres below.

Excerpt from a letter home

Then, after some raucous parties in Tiberias (the hostel was very festive!) it was back to Jerusalem for some spiritual renewal. Here I met a friendly Australian guy – Mark. We really clicked and decided to travel through Jordan together. So down to Eliat in Southern Israel, a real touristy hell hole of a place with temperatures over 40ºC and enormous cockroaches in our hostel room. From there we crossed the border into Jordan to Aquaba, and Arab seaside resort where local women are definitely not allowed to wear bikinis. The first thing that strikes everyone about Jordan is how genuinely friendly the people are. Smiles and “welcome” wherever you go. On occasion, locals in the buses insisted on paying our fares for us and taxi drivers bought us drinks. Petra was probably the highlight of my whole trip so far – it has to be seen to be believed. Wherever you look – massive, towering temples and tombs carved out of the cliffs. The postcards I sent will give you a feel – but definitely don’t do it justice.

From Petra we headed north to Amman, the capital of Jordan which we used as a springboard to see all the outlying sights including Jerash (huge Roman ruins), Karak (crusader castle) and we also went for another dip in the Dead Sea, from the east side. This time, all the women were swimming in their black robes. Jordan is a very religious country – devout Muslims everywhere. It is very male dominated and women have to dress conservatively. Western women don’t always have an easy time here.  Unfortunately, because of TV and movies that Jordanians watch, men think that western women are all “free and easy” – easy to seduce and consequently female tourists get hassled a lot, especially if they are alone or wearing revealing clothes. The big advantage is that female tourists travelling alone (or in groups) are always on the look out for tourist males to travel with them – as protection. We, of course, were only too happy to oblige! We travelled for half a week with two gorgeous Dutch girls, and then met up with a fun group of really pretty Italians. You’re never lonely in the Middle East because the culture is so “alien”, tourists tend to be very open and friendly to each other – we constantly bumped into people we had met in other towns and then would travel together for a few days before going our separate ways.

After Jordan we made our way into Egypt.



Travel Notes


Petra

• So friendly at customs! Free on South African passport. Catch taxi to Petra (no buses). To friendly hostel - R 14 a night to sleep on roof and R 21 for all you can eat. Musa Spring Hostel. We watch Indianana Jones and the Last Crusade. Phone Ally to arrange her flight to Turkey to join me.

• Tues 28, we visit Petra. Awesome temples and tombs sculptured out of cliff faces. Treasury. Roman amphitheatre. The Monastery - ventured right up on top of it. 45 m high. Gorgeous canyons and views. Petra was built by Nabateans. Lost for 700 years till discovered again in 1812. So many monumental feats - all inspired by spiritual.

• Wed 29, back to Petra. Walk to animal sacrificial altar at peak of mountain. Nice lazy day.

Amman

• Thurs 30 bus to Amman. Arab music galore. Great food at local restaurant, real cheap. To Jerash - a massive ancient Roman town. Spectacular theatre with accoustic center in floor that magnifies sound. Temples, complete arches, glorious central point with column. Very impressive - only 10% excavated. Bugger - we lose my travel book. Mark and I having many deep chats about everything. Getting to know each other pretty well.

• Fri 1/8, a day of visiting desert castles. Go with two very attractive Dutch girls. Decide to go by bus, not tour. Whole day costs us 2.5 dinar instead of ten. Bus to Azraq Castle - dry stone with roof strong enough to walk on. Three ton door of swinging rock. Then taxi to Quasr Amra, with early Islam mosaics of naked women - very rare. Hitch to Quasr Kharaneh, a medium castle / inn with dark rooms and fantastic views of desert from top.  Hitchhiking with Dutch girls - quick pickup. Without, would be very slow!

• Sat 2, visit Madaba to see 6th century map of Palestine on floor of Church of St George. All way back to Amman to go to Karak - massive Crusader Castle with spectacular views and warren of underground chambers and tunnels. 7 stories. Meet hotel manager who loves students - tells us secret of his menu. We pay local price. We have been joined by Stefan, a lovely German chap.

• Sun 3, we go where Angels fear to tread - just for a swim in the Dead Sea. Realise importance (and money saving potential of a good travel book. Lonely Planet much better than Lets Go - more concise and practical. Bus to withn 5 km of sea, then hitch to eventual beach - but must catch slow bus back to Amman where we are forced to spend the night. Our packs still in Karak!

• Impressions: Now that cheap prices, we suddenly hugely price concsious. Will do anything to save a dinar (1 £ English!) Roof everynight with great stars - 2 E£. Food of roast chicken, bread, olives and chiles is 1.5 E£. Bargain for all. Hurt looks, outraged, then all smiles when finalised. Tea. If not bargain, hurt. Chap accepts first offer, oh alright, less. Pity him.

• Women in black coverings with just eyes showing (erotic says Stefan!) - some even covered on beach. Bus routes that make no sense - every journey must start from Amman. Arab markets bustling with goat carcasses hanging everywhere - head included. Friendly people - policeman pays for our bus + gives us his phone number if any problems. Taxi buys us free drinks.

• People take us to 20 minute destinations in person. Apparently, Syria even friendlier - 5 free drinks an hour. In buses, we "converse" for hours with folk who can't speak word of English. Arab music really grows on you - definitely an acquired taste. Buses leave when full - never a problem to find the right bus (friendly people point way), challenge is finding correct station.

• Mon 4, an epic day of travel. From Amman to Karak to get our bags. We manage to catch "service" to Aquaba - cramped in the stuffy back with scratchy speakers. Then a beaurocratic wait for passport stamp and a three hour ferry (beautiful scenery) to Sinai.

Next stop

• Egypt

Israel (16 – 27 July)

Tel Aviv, Jerusalem, Masada, Dead Sea, Galilee, Golan Heights, Eilat

Photos, letters and notes from my 11 days solo backpacking in Israel

Places visited

Photos

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Excerpt from a letter

The Middle East has been a real experience – so different from travelling in Europe. The first thing that strikes you is the climate – it’s very hot. In Eilat and Aquaba we experienced temperatures well into 40ºC. There are advantages – one is able to travel really light with just a pair of shorts and a few T shirts (drying washed clothes is an instantaneous affair) – and accommodation is always cheap because all you need is a mattress on the roof (I’ve become addicted to sleeping under the stars).

As you probably know from my postcards, I began my trip by flying into Tel Aviv. After a very short stay (too hot and too modern), I went on to Jerusalem and instantly fell in love with it. Jerusalem is a city that has to be experienced rather than “done”. It is a holy city to Jews, Christians and Muslims, full of extraordinary religious sites and interesting people. The old city is split into four very distinctive segments – Armenian, Christian, Muslim and Jewish – and, of course, the sights and flavours of each are different. It’s amazing how all the religions co-exist in such a concentrated spot. From the roof of my hostel I had a great view of the Christian “Holy Sepulchre”, the site where Jesus is thought to have been crucified. This is probably regarded as the “holiest” site in the Christian religion. No more than 200 metres away I could also see the ‘Dome of the Rock”, an unbelievably beautiful mosque and the third most holy site in the world of the Muslim. Only a hair breath away from here is the “Western Wall”, revered by Jews as their most holy site in the world. NO wonder there are sometimes tensions in Jerusalem. When I was there, everything seemed to be so calm and serene. It was quite a shock when I hears that there had been a bomb blast killing 14 people – particularly considering it went off only a couple of days after I had left Israel. Some of the highlights of my Jerusalem trip included walking along the Via Dolorosa, the road long which Jesus was through to have carried his cross. There are 14 special stations (chapels) along the way commemorating particular events on the journey. I also went to the Western Wall on Shabbat and watched hundreds of Jewish worshippers take part in the sacred tradition – very special. I also climbed up the Olive Mount (famous as the place where Jesus rode into Jerusalem on his donkey on Palm Sunday and ascended into heaven on Ascension Day. The views of the city from here were spectacular.

Another interesting excursion was to wade through a watery tunnel deep under the city – really eerie especially considering that it was Jerusalem’s ancient water supply. Needless to say, my shoes were sopping wet – the first thing I did was to visit a mosque so I could take them off and leet them dry. You get quite confused sometimes; when you visit Christian churches you are often only allowed in with trousers on (no baring your hairy legs!). When visiting Jewish holy places, you’ve got to cover your head and sometimes trousers are required. Visit a mosque and your shoes must come off. All the dressing and undressing! Problem was the only trousers I had were jeans – too hot to wear in the climate, so I had to carry them in my bag for when the need arose.

From Jerusalem I explored the Dead Sea in the Negev Desert – a weird experience to say the least. I’m glad I didn’t shave on the morning of my swim as others did – they were in agony from the salt. The mud on the bottom of the sea is supposed to be very good for your skin so we took delight in covering ourselves from head to foot in the stuff – deliciously slimy stuff that took ages to wash off.

Part of the Dead Sea experience included climbing Masada at 3am in the morning to watch the sunrise and a visit to the beautiful oasis of Ein Gedi. From there to Tiberias on the Sea of Galilee, which I used as a springboard to explore the Golan Heights (north tip of Israel). Compared to the rest of Israel, this area is lush with beautiful rivers and lakes and date trees everywhere. The highlight was swimming in the icy waters of the Bunyan Waterfall.

Then, after some raucous parties in Tiberias (the hostel was very festive!) it was back to Jerusalem for some spiritual renewal. Here I met a friendly Australian guy – Mark. We really clicked and decided to travel through Jordan together. So down to Eliat in Southern Israel, a real touristy hell hole of a place with temperatures over 40ºC and enormous cockroaches in our hostel room. From there we crossed the border into Jordan to Aquaba, and Arab seaside resort where local women are definitely not allowed to wear bikinis. The first thing that strikes everyone about Jordan is how genuinely friendly the people are. Smiles and “welcome” wherever you go. On occasion, locals in the buses insisted on paying our fares for us and taxi drivers bought us drinks. Petra was probably the highlight of my whole trip so far – it has to be seen to be believed. Wherever you look – massive, towering temples and tombs carved out of the cliffs. The postcards I sent will give you a feel – but definitely don’t do it justice.

From Petra we headed north to Amman, the capital of Jordan which we used as a springboard to see all the outlying sights including Jerash (huge Roman ruins), Karak (crusader castle) and we also went for another dip in the Dead Sea, from the east side. This time, all the women were swimming in their black robes. Jordan is a very religious country – devout Muslims everywhere. It is very male dominated and women have to dress conservatively. Western women don’t always have an easy time here – or anywhere for that matter. Unfortunately, because of TV and movies that Jordanians watch, men think that western women are all “free and easy” – easy to seduce and consequently female tourists get hassled a lot, especially if they are alone or wearing revealing clothes. The big advantage is that female tourists travelling alone (or in groups) are always on the look out for tourist males to travel with them – as protection. We, of course, were only too happy to oblige! We travelled for half a week with two gorgeous Dutch girls, and then met up with a fun group of really pretty Italians. You’re never lonely in the Middle East because the culture is so “alien”, tourists tend to be very open and friendly to each other – we constantly bumped into people we had met in other towns and then would travel together for a few days before going our separate ways.

After Jordan we made our way into Egypt. To do so we had to use a ferry across the Red Sea. What an experience it was. Two hours late and crammed so tight with locals there was hardly a place to sit on the open deck –not to mention the problem of the beating sun on the three hour crossing. Drank lots of water. After another two hours in Egyptian customs (you would not believe how inefficient and slow the Egyptian “wheels” turn), we were free to begin our hedonistic lifestyle on the Red Sea.

Travel Notes

Tel Aviv

• Fly to Tel Aviv via Athens. Hot! Meet friendly Australian (Mark). Stay at Gordon Inn.
  Lie and swim at beach. Walk to Jaffa. Write post cards.

Jerusalem & surrounds

• Sat 18 July: Catch "sheroot" to Jerusalem. Walk round Old City. Armenian Quarter. Mount Zion, including David's Tomb. Visit Olive Mount for panoramic views and holy churches & tombs. Walk along Via Dolorasa - road of sorrow along which Jesus carried the cross. Saw some of 14 stations. Experienced Falafel and Shawarma.
• Impressions: Spirituality hangs in the air like a blanket. Jerusalem. 5000 years old, steeped in history. Mosques, Synagogues and churches within a hair breath. 18 conquerors + destroyed 7 times. Orthodox Jews in black with side locks bobbing at the Wall. Have to put on jeans for holiest sites - hot!. Put on my cap for Jewish holies, take off for Christian, shoes off for Muslim. Pilgrims carry cross along Via Dolorasa. Religious, kitch relics everywhere including hologram of Jesus on cross with blinking eyes. Night views of city from hostel roof. Israeli baby soldiers with guns. Arab markets along roofed, narrow streets.
• Sun 19 July: Go on mini bus tour (3 am get up) to Masada for moonset and sunrise, swim in Dead Sea, walk to waterfalls at Ein Gedi. To Mount of Temptation. Jericho. Qumran where Dead Sea scrolls found. Mountain clinging monasteries. Meet nice British guy (engineer).
• In Jerusalem, visit the , site of Jesus tomb and crucifixion. Church dilapidated because no denomination can take responsibility. I write a letter asking for God to show Himself. Sit on hostel roof, overlooking city by night. Call to prayer.
  Mon 20 July: Visit St Anne's Church (beautiful Crusader church with great accoustics) and Pool of Bethesda. Then to City of David and Kidron Valley. See Warren's Shaft. A wet walk through Hezekiah's Tunnel with little Arab chaps. Absalom's pillar. Then to Temple Mount to see Dome of the Rock and Al Aqsa Mosque. To Western Wall (and Wilson's Arch) where I leave message. Bobbing orthodox while pray. Black robes and hats.
• Tues 21 July: Meet Mark again (Australian I met on first night). For breakfast at Michael's Cafe, then to David's Tower museum for history of Jerusalem.

Galilee and Golan Heights

• Bus to Tiberius where can't get beyond hotels to swim. Stay at Aviv hostel.
• Wed 22 July: Tour to Golan Heights. Befriend Jessica (Canadian) and Miss Margaret (Byzantine historian). Experiences include Church of the Multiplication of the Loaves and Fishes (6th century mosaics on 4th century foundations), Mount of Beatitudes (sermon on the mount), wine and liquor tasting (pear, lichi etc), Banias Waterfall, Nimrods's Fortress, museum about Gamla and its destruction by Romans, The Good Fence. Beware of mines signs. Drink pear wine and Thai food with J&B.
• Thurs 23 July: Lazy day swimming in Sea of Galilee. In evening, go out with Jessica and co.

Jerusalem Revisited

• Fri 24 July: Bus to Beit She'an for amazing Roman and Byzantine excavations - especially amphitheatre. To Jerusalem to Western Wall for evening of Shabat. Lots of bobbing and singing. American Jewish visitors especially charismatic.
• Impression: Judaism, Christianity and Islam all so linked - same characters, area, "one god" - just different emphasis on which prophets (Jesus, ancient Jewish, Mohammed) to focus on. Huge importance of symbols, rituals, heritage (incl Holy sites) in religion.
• Dead Sea scrolls shows how people write blue prints for religion - specifications of battle for final war against enemy. Gospels written hundreds of years after Jesus - vocal legends that amplify? Same with illiterate Muhammed. Definite lessons for my Spirituality which is doing well - whenever feel at peace, I pray to Great Mystery and focus on "Blue Blade." 
• Huge cemetery on Mount of Olives - when messiah returns, will be first to rise from dead.
• Sat 25 July: Meet Mark. To Schindler's grave (rocks) and Soloman's Quarry under Old City. Then to Museum of Israel for archeological finds and Dead Sea Scrolls. Stay in beautiful Lutherine Hostel - a veritable oasis.
• Sun 26 July: False 4 o'clock get up! Get to watch Jerusalem lighten from the roof.

Eilat

• Eventually get bus to Eilat. 40 degrees with hot gusts. Stay in shit hole with cockroaches (Eucalyptus). Swim in Red Sea - perfect temperature. Very touristy town.
• Mon 27 July: Laze some more on beach while wait for Mark's visa. Postcard trauma - not put enough stamp on. Dave Hudson off to post office to pay! Phone Mum. Then cross border to Jordon.
• Israel has been fantastic. I have experienced a surge in my spirituality. Tension between two travel instincts - find spiritual oases and experience at length with my heart verse rushing around seeing sights.
• A couple of days after leaving Israel, there is a bomb blast in Jerusalem in Jaffa Street market. Two Arab suicide bombers kill 14 and injure over 100. I bought a chocolate pastry right there. So sad, fundamentalist extremists causing mountains of pain. I get a taste of Jerusalems violent past.

Next stop

• Jordan

A Vision of Power and Glory (John Kehoe)

Chapter 1. The Beginning
The spiritual path is not about religions or dogma. It is not about finding the one true way. It is simply the wonder of our own beauty being revealed to ourselves. Of discovering inner sources of power and guidance, and following the path our hearts show us. It is about opening ourselves up to the amazing possibilities that life affords us. For there is more here than we can possibly imagine and all will be greatly rewarded who venture within.

Chapter 2. The Vision
Ours is a great, holy, wondrous and noble race. All power is given to us. This truth is encoded deep within us for each of us to discover. We are kings and queens with cosmic, royal bloodlines. We have been born with great destinies to fulfil. Our kingdom stretches as far as mortal eyes can see. It contains mountains and oceans and great forests and the stars and the sun and moon. It contains inner worlds where mystics and shamans have travelled and brought back tales of wonder. We are greater than our thoughts can imagine and more beautiful than anything our eyes can behold. But woe are we. For ours is a kingdom in disarray. A spell has been cast and our race, in mortal sleep, knows not its truth. We have been tricked into believing a lie and we are paying greatly for it. It has hardened our hearts, dimmed our senses and made us into something we do not understand.

Chapter 3. Honouring the Ancestors
Christ died for my sins. Buddha became enlightened so I, too, could become enlightened. Black Elk had visions so I could share his visions. We are all one tribe. We who live today receive the benefit of every spiritual act from every person who has ever lived. The river of consciousness flows through the minds of all, past and present. It is through this river that we lift each other up through acts of the spirit like kindness and prayer. We are all joined. Within our consciousness is contained the wisdom of the ancestors, learned on their own explorations. They have left beacons for us to follow home. We honour the ancestors by studying the paths they walked. Their truths exist not only in books and oral traditions, but also in our consciousness. They will speak in dreams and symbols. Within us all truth is alive, waiting for us to discover. The ancestors can help me discover a path that speaks to my heart. I will follow this path with all my being. We who are alive are the new torchbearers. I will find my sacred song and sing its truth. By kindling my flame, I become a flame of the Great Mystery.

Chapter 4. The First Gate
We live in a trance - overwhelmed by our never-ending thoughts - desires, worries, fears, regrets and hopes. They distract our attention constantly. We perceive our world not directly but through these images. We live in a cocoon of our own making. How to break out into the realm beyond? I can let go of my mind and sink below the surface of my consciousness. Searching with the mind is like swimming on the surface - swim the whole ocean and I will find nothing. I sink to the place of stillness within. I bathe in the Holy Presence. With practice, this inner sanctuary becomes a refuge within my busy world. I feel at peace. From here the inner presence nourishes me with living waters. From here my prayers carry much power. From here the voice speaks to me sweetly. Helps me in my day-to-day affairs. Tells me truths long forgotten by my race.

Chapter 5. The Book of Law
The Book of Law falls open. Its pages are empty. "What is real?” asks the voice of Truth to the spirits of all who have lived. Like the sound of a raging river, I hear the voices of millions, each proclaiming their truth - all different with many contradictions. Silence fills the air and there is great expectation: "As thou hast believed, so it is true. Whatever you believe within, that you will see without. All power belongs to those who believe."

Chapter 6. The Temple Within
Tarry not, your temple is in disarray. There is work to be done. A new temple must be built. I will show you what to do. A complete restructuring of my belief system is required. I am called to build a temple with new, more powerful spiritual beliefs. My old, limiting beliefs must be changed. Every belief I possess about myself and my world must be re-examined in this new light. Will it strengthen the temple? Empower me? Awaken within me my sacred song? Assist me on my path? All the beliefs that fail must be halved and quartered by the Warrior. "Do you serve my master?" Through countless generations of neglect, the stream of consciousness of our race has been polluted by fear, doubt and weakness. Like leeches, they suck the life force from us. Blind us from our true power and glory. Deceiver. You belong not in my temple. I am prepared to deny my reality. Turn heaven and earth upside down. I need not accept what others have previously accepted. My temple will be a strong vessel, able to withstand the most vigorous journeys, for I intend to explore vigorously through unknown waters both within and without. Great and noble are the destinies of those who dare to follow this path.

Chapter 7. Building the Temple
In building my temple, I draw from many sources. I drink deeply from the well of my ancestors. I choose the finest beliefs I can find. Beliefs that speak to my heart. I feel no restraint in borrowing, adding or deleting from one system to the next. Do I believe it? It doesn't matter! Do I choose to believe it! My beliefs are chosen from within, not imposed from without. Daily, like eating and bathing, I focus and meditate upon the things I wish to believe. Imagine them to be true. And use simple affirmations. To imprint these onto my consciousness in much the same way as the times table. I know that any thought or concept which is fed and nourished through repetition will take hold within me. "Think not of results, just do." So said a Russian mystic. I labour to claim this reality. Until my beliefs become a living, flaming reality. Remember, this is not a path for the sluggard. Much is required before anything is gained. But I persist because there is no way for the temple to built but for one stone upon another.

Chapter 8. Coming home
I see myself just as I am. I have spent my life trying to be something else. To be more successful, better looking, smarter. I let go of that. I pull up a chair and get acquainted with the me that exists right now. I am enough! I am beautiful as I am. This is a wonderful and courageous step. Knowing and accepting myself without illusion takes a big burden off my shoulders. I can relax and enjoy myself. I become more tolerant of myself and others. I am able to delight in uniqueness. I come home to life as well. Things are what they are. I let go and allow life to just happen, instead of trying to orchestrate it. I appreciate everything just for what it is. I've tried to make believe life is something it is not - some utopia where every dream is fulfilled. Life is happy and sad. Life is joy and grief. Life is health and sickness. Life is excitement and boredom. Life is having friends and being lonely. Life is achieving your goals and failing at your goals. Life is being confused and being sure. Life is what it is and if I look at it beyond my illusion of what I think it should be, I find within its diversity, tremendous beauty and goodness. Friendship, a brilliant blue sky, making love, sunsets, acts of kindness, the beach, trees, a good movie, delicious food, a hot bath, beautiful music. Maybe there's no caviar but there's always a hot bowl of soup and it will nourish me. I let go of any bitterness, disappointment, anxiety or frustration and let the sun warm my bones. Wake up! Life is spilling out abundantly. Come home and enjoy it.

 

Chapter 9. Carry thyself with dignity
Behold thyself in glory. Love thyself as I love you. In this way you honour me. It is my duty to love myself deeply, totally, unconditionally. To see my dignity and nobility. To see myself as something of great worth. To do less is to deny the task for which I was born. Look at the flowering tree. I do not examine its flaws - this flower is beautiful, this one so-so. I appreciate it for what it is. Am I less than this tree? What is this neurotic self-examination that makes me feel ashamed, not good enough, unworthy, inferior. Am I not as beautiful as any star in the galaxy? As unique as a storm? As brilliant and radiant as the dawn of a new day? Of course I am! I am beautiful, special and unique. I see it clearly, not with intellect or reason but with depth and assurance. Is that the tree smiling back at me as if to say "What took you so long?" Have I been initiated into a secret?

 

Chapter 10. Bind thy wounds
If you have no scars, no bitter regrets or humiliating failures, then what kind of life have you been living? You are not of my tribe and belong not at my table. I sup with those whose battle scars cover their bodies and am proud to have lived gloriously through all that life has offered. Those that have bound their wounds and moved on. Life is an epic odyssey. Battles won and lost. Opportunities missed and seized. Fortune and misfortune both ours to experience. But what of my faults and inadequacies? I resolve to love them as part of who I am. I am beautiful because of them. They are part of my uniqueness, like markings on a wild animal. They give me flavour. Make me real. Wounds heal when I forgive myself and others for our humanness. I allow myself and others to make mistakes, miss opportunities, and make foolish decisions. I recognise and accept my vulnerability and fragility. My quirks and idiosyncrasies - all part of who I am. I am beautiful and special because of my humanness - in fact, this is where my true beauty lies. I do not complain each time I am wounded. I see the gifts that wounds bring. They spur me, change me, and give me compassion. And besides, wounds heal.

Chapter 11. And if the wounds cannot be bound
And if the wounds cannot be bound - bleed, bleed for me. For this, too, is holy. If the wound will not heal, then let it soak the earth in its pain and sorrow. Let your pain become an offering, a cleansing. Offer it joyously. Everyone must at one time or another carry a burden. No one is immune. It is the law of our being. And some carry greater burdens than others - this too is law. Ours is not to understand but to walk the path we find ourselves upon. If we have done everything we can - prayed for guidance, listened sincerely and followed - purified ourselves of self pity, depression, anger and resentment - and our path leads further into the valley of sorrow, then lift the cup to your lips and drink. "Not my will but thine." Venture ahead fearlessly, knowing there are gifts and treasures on this path too. We feel the suffering of others deep within us. We see thousands worse off than ourselves. We see we are blessed. I see the world anew through my pain. Released from self-absorption, simple things bless me deeply. I wonder why I ever worried about such trivial things in the past. But if the unhealed wound is tainted with bitterness and pity, then indeed we walk through the path of hell and all beautiful things are hidden from us. But always there is a way out, and always the path is through ourselves. Great is the mystery that shows us the path to the light.

Chapter 12. Judge thyself not
The Great Mystery never judges me. It supports, nourishes, loves and accepts me totally. And it encourages me to do the same. "Love thyself as I love you." And it is not just me that the Great Mystery loves. It comforts everyone, even the most wicked. Such is its love. None will be punished except those who punish themselves. All is forgiven when you forgive yourself. One thing only is asked of us: that we love and accept ourselves as the universe has loved and accepted us. That is all. I resolve to renounce all guilt and remorse for all mistakes, past and future. I do my best. No more is asked. Sometimes I will make bad decisions. Sometimes consequences will result which will hurt others. I am human. But I will not pay too much heed to these things. I will offer a silent prayer and move on. There is no point in regret or self-recrimination. For no matter how dire the consequences I imagine, the sun will still shine. Rivers will still run. The tree will produce fruit. The ocean tides will ebb. When I allow myself to be human and let go of my harsh judgements, I flower and bloom. My eyes are opened to my worth. Talents and gifts I never knew I had, begin to reveal themselves. Every part of me bathes in the warm glow of love and acceptance. Strengths, abilities, weaknesses and inadequacies. All things become new. No regret or shame. A life nourished from within. As the day accepts the sun and the night accepts the moon, so I accept myself. And so I become complete and whole.

Chapter 13. Prayer
The spiritual path is a path of prayer. Prayer is food for the soul and the universe. Prayer connects us, humbles us, strengthens us, enlightens us and makes us one with the Great Mystery.

The Prayer of the Holy Presence. A prayer of moment-to-moment worship with the Great Mystery. One needs to spend time with the Holy One. Like any relationship, it must be built and nurtured. It needs familiarity. Trust. Quiet, special time together. This goes beyond thoughts and concepts. Losing oneself in the presence. Letting anxieties and concerns melt away as I am transcended and uplifted.

Prayer of Praise and Gratitude. The more I thank and praise, the more beauty I perceive. As if praise washes and cleanses my eyes so more is revealed. This prayer is a door into the path of beauty.

Prayer of Love and Acceptance. I start with myself. I love and accept myself totally, for I know that until I can do this, I cannot truly love another, not even the Great Mystery. When I put myself down, I ridicule the work of the Great Mystery. Next I accept and love my fellow brothers and sisters - even (especially) those most annoying and repugnant to me. How deep is our love if we cannot love the violator as well as the violated? Do not both urgently need love and healing? There is no enemy, there is only ignorance. There is no one to hate, only many to love. Does the Great Mystery love this person? Always the answer is yes. Should I do less? Then I love and accept my life, imperfect as it may be. For it is the one I have been given. My life is sacred, special and holy. It is a great honour to have this experience of life. And finally, I love and accept the Great Mystery.

The Prayer of Request. An important and relevant prayer. It is the Father's good pleasure to give me the things I desire. "Whatsoever ye pray for and ask for, believing ye have received it, ye will receive it." When I want the Great Mystery to bring something into my life, I create that image in my mind. I spend time each day claiming it as mine already. I do not hope or plead. I simply create the images in my mind and live the experience of having it - with feeling and intensity for several moments at a time. Believe that it has already happened. Then I just let go of it. Let the Great Mystery work with these images. The power at work here is greater than my understanding.

 

Chapter 14. Fire Keeping
Deep within each of us is a flame that burns, and that flame is the spark of the Holy One. In some it burns strongly, in others it is barely distinguishable, but always it is there. With love and acceptance this flame grows. We can help others to kindle this flame by seeing the good in them, even if they do not see it in themselves. These are the fire keepers and great is their calling. Great is their glory.

Chapter 15. The Darkness
You must rededicate and redevote yourself again and again after the inevitable lapses and periods of dullness and inactivity. You will fail again and again. You will stumble and fall hundreds, even thousands of times. Before any real growth and stability appears you will despair, lose faith, get discouraged, doubt, feel sorry for yourself, and wonder if anything will happen. Does this mean you have lost your path? No, not at all - this IS the path. A Spiritual Journal can help to chart our progress (attempts, half starts, periods of activity and slackness) and discover ebbs and flows. Understand that there is an ebb and a flow of consciousness. The inner journey flows with tides just as real as the oceans. The Holy Spirit will fill me and I will live in full and dazzling awareness of its existence. Then just as unexpectedly, the awareness will leave. To suddenly return again. I know and understand the tides. When the darkness comes, I have a lamp and oil and wait for the light to return. I am at peace in the dark, having sailed these waters before. Spiritual practices during the darkness are necessary parts of the path and they strengthen our inner being immensely. If I wish to venture into deep waters, then I must learn to swim, not just with the current, but against the tide as well. This is not a journey for the timid or frail. So have an infinite amount of compassion for yourself. Pick yourself up again and again. Everything is as it should be.

Chapter 16. Details
Cooking, paying bills, going to bed, talking to a friend on the phone, going to the store, ironing a shirt. A life is full of details. Mundane details. Yet it is in these details that the fabric of life is revealed. The fabric a whole and yet each thread a part of the whole. I love and rejoice in the parts because I love the whole. Brother Lawrence, the Christian Mystic who attained his spirituality through devotion to his duties as a cook in the monastery, said, "God does not measure the size of a deed but the amount of love that goes in it." His every act was a prayer. Nothing is ordinary unless the most beautiful gem is ordinary. Unless the brilliant colours of the sunset are ordinary. Must every star be the brightest? Every flower, the most beautiful? If so, where is the contrast, the divergence of hues? A bird, a stone, the wind, the human being-each of us has our own reality, yet we are all one family. Each living and non-living thing is intimately connected with each other thing. Each has its own song to sing. Each fulfils a purpose. Everything has a destiny. Everything is part of the tapestry. Every movement we make, no matter how insignificant we think it is, is a tiny thread of the whole. Each of us participates in our own way. Each of us adds to the tapestry. Each of us weaves. Together with the sun and moon and every living thing, we make the patterns, and so the Mystery unfolds.

Chapter 17. The Awakened Heart
The awakened heart exists in one whose boundaries between self and others have been expanded. My heart expands to embrace others. And so I help because I want to. To lend a hand, an ear, give some time, concern, money - whatever seems appropriate. As I lose myself momentarily in service to others, I am nourished and find a nurturing inner peace. I let my heart breathe and beat for more than just myself. I become the vehicle through which the Great Mystery showers gifts upon others, because so many gifts have been showered upon me. I need not join any organisation, just follow my heart and do good. One step at a time. The heart opens slowly and sweetly like a flower emerging from a tight, hard bud. Sometimes when I practice service, I do it as an act of worship. I lose myself in worship of the GM. "As ye have done to the least of my brethren ye have done unto me." Every act of kindness becomes a prayer. Whatever good I do, I do not expect any praise or benefit. I am only a warrior serving my king. When I strive, I feel anxious, not in tune. When I let go, do what I am called to do and allow things to be what they are, I feel empowered, free, and alive. Sometimes I am called to action. Sometimes I am not. Not all crosses are mine to bear. I have not come to save the world and solve every social problem. It is enough to save myself and maybe make a good hot cup of tea for my fellow brothers and sisters along the way. Anything more is folly and conceit. I embrace action but renounce striving. I will do my best and let the universe take care of the rest. I can of myself do nothing unless the GM works through me. The GM has within it rhythms and cycles beyond what any of us can understand. The tides ebb and flow. The moon grows full and wanes. So it is with the affairs of men and nations. I allow these things to be and simply follow my heart wherever it leads me. I am never called to strive or worry or concern myself with consequence. A greater one than me looks after these things. I am the branch and the GM is the tree. I am a vehicle by which the source nourishes and spills out abundantly to its people.

 

Chapter 18. The Warrior and the Sacred Song
Each of us has a gift, a talent to give back to the world. It may be small or large, it does not matter. The sacred song is our own unique gift, our purpose, and each of us was born to discover and share it with the world. The sacred song can only be brought to life when the awakened heart weds the warrior's spirit. Only we can sing our sacred song. If we do not awaken it, it is lost to the world forever. We need the warrior's spirit within us. The world cries out for warriors. Gentle, kind and loving. But warriors nonetheless. Men and women who are not afraid to follow their vision. To be different. To risk all for the sake of something great. And to do this takes immense bravery. Brave, not through arrogance, but through humility and trust. The warrior approaches each task with a quiet confidence. Confidence because the voice within is an ally: it guides and directs him. Confidence because the power of the whole universe will come to his aid if he is rightfully aligned. Is this a sacred task? Will it nourish the people? The warrior goes into battle well prepared. His armour is his beliefs. Powerful beliefs about himself and his relationship to the GM, created through discipline and training. And in his right hand is a sword unsheathed - dynamic will, fulfilling the vision of the inner voice. For the warrior fights not just for himself, but also for the greatest good of all. He fights to birth the vision and he fights to win. It is his duty to win. The warrior knows the trickery of the enemy. The power of laziness, fear, doubt, confusion, feelings of inadequacy and a host of other demons to which the polluted waters of our race have given birth. He knows these enemies must be defeated. He stalks them with ingenuity and cunning. Gets to know their ways and habits and then quietly but effectively surmounts them one by one. True warriorship will take place within us when we shed our weakness and awaken to the act that we come from a long lineage of great ones, and we agree to take our place amongst them. We are the carriers of the torch of consciousness. We are creators of the future. The warrior's spirit exists in one who has dedicated himself to the path. The spirit of the warrior is one of resolve and determination. It drives through and over all obstacles. It is a commitment to follow the vision whatever the vision may be and wherever it may lead. To be genuine in each moment of our life. To be honest with ourselves. To respect the path we have chosen and follow it through to completion. This is how the sacred song is birthed. How our destinies are fulfilled. Each of us adding in our own way. Each of us an integral part of the whole. Each of us the Mystery unfolding.

Chapter 19. The Path of Power
Come let us tap into a source of power infinitely more reliable than any you have known before. All power comes from the GM. To walk the path of power, this truth must be as real to us as the sun at noon. It is possible to draw to ourselves whatever we desire. It is possible to become great in whatever our calling. It is possible to be as the mighty ones of old. We can do this because we can draw directly from the great cosmic reservoirs. Understand the Great Paradox. The Path of Power involves becoming less, not more. Less of me, the ego. More of the Great Mystery. When I quieten my mind and remain in stillness and feel this power, I feel renewed and empowered. To do this is to drink from the living waters. Here is the source of all power. Here is the source of my being. And here too, is my centre - not only mine but the centre of all centres. And in this holy centre, which existed before time itself, I live and move and have my being. Within me flow the living waters. Within me exist the laws and secrets. Within me is the source of all power. Within me lives the Holy Presence. Within me, everything. As my consciousness expands, my whole being changes and I vibrate at a higher frequency. Inner truths are perceived. Veils are lifted. I see with new eyes. It is through my deepening awareness that the gates of power are opened to me. Power is like a river. One is either aligned with it or not. Swimming with the current or against it. To recognising the GM as the source of all things and to align ourselves with it, is to have access to this power. We will find it indeed brings us all we desire. If we rely solely on our own means, what little we have will be taken away. The amount of energy we receive from the great cosmic reservoir is limited solely by our capacity for realisation.

 

Chapter 20. Walking the Path of Beauty
It is our sacred duty to awaken beauty in our lives. To let it fill our hearts and minds. In this way, we help to purify the consciousness of our race. The first step is when we accept life totally and unconditionally. Like a lover or an old friend, it has been with me through ups and downs. One day I wake up and realise I love it. Pain, heartaches and all. I allow life to be what it is. Life becomes my lover, spouse, companion. When we expect life to always please us, we live an illusion. It is neurotic too need to be happy, fulfilled, stimulated every hour of every day. We shun anything unpleasant. Flee from these experiences instead of accepting them as part of life. In so doing, we unconsciously reject life. Wait for something better than what is happening right now, when in fact all around us the miracle is unfolding. For every desire we fulfil, new desires rush to take their place. This was Buddha's great realisation. Everything in life is transitory. Feel the tenderness and fragility of it all. This makes it all the more precious. For every moment is unique. It can be appreciated only once and only now. Let us kiss our lover each moment. Let us accept it totally. Everything is perfect in being what it is. When I fully accept this, I walk the path of beauty. When I cease my judging, criticizing, comparing, I see that all things have their place. Even failure, sickness, misfortune play their part. In the grand scheme of the universe unfolding, all things are as they should be. Not so much as a hair is out of place in the universe. All things are unfolding in their special way. I have nothing to be concerned with or complain about. On the contrary, I have much to celebrate. The present moment is always alive with infinite treasures. Life is spilling out at us in abundance. Children playing. Birds singing. Colours. Flowers blooming. Wind in the branches. Ants crawling. Night and day. Poetry. Music. Making love. Friendship. Travelling. Eating. The universe is celebrating. Let us celebrate with it. A child sees everything as wondrous. Walking the path of beauty means living moment to glorious moment, letting everything be new and exciting again. Let us also see the beauty in one another's hearts. For every act of cruelty or deception, ordinary people perform a thousand acts of kindness. As you see beauty, praise it. Give thanks for it. Fill your mind with it. It will multiply and pour back a hundredfold. Open your heart and mind with continual practice. This will bring bountiful fruit. Like William Blake, we too will see God in a blade of grass and eternity in a grain of sand. Walking the path of beauty means worshipping at the temple of ourselves. Celebrating ourselves as beings glorious as the sun. As tender and innocent as newborn babes. As powerful as a raging river. Mysterious. Sacred. Holy. This is who we are.

Chapter 21. The Journey into Now
Here is home. Right here where I am, in this moment, regardless of where I am or what I am feeling. Each day, the journey takes me deeper into unknown territory. I am a nomad. We are all nomads. There is no stability here. No permanence. Nothing to grasp and hang onto. I cannot make life stand still. Everything is moving, changing, becoming something else. I can coax it. Try to direct it in the ways I want it to go. And I do these things and sometimes very successfully. But just when I think I’ve got everything sorted out and co-operating with me, off it goes, full of twists and turns, absurd reversals, outrageous surprises, crises, things you could never imagine and it won't stop. Home is movement, constant movement. If I wish to be comfortable in my home, I had best embrace the journey, pack my bags and travel lightly. I rid myself of excess baggage. I resolve too lose my life in order to find it again. With the smell of the open air and the wind at my back, I discover that I am at the very centre of the universe. And the pulsating, ever present Now reveals itself to me. Joyously letting go. Now becomes alive, radiant, all encompassing. Nothing is needed when I lose myself in its presence. Desires, worries, what are these? How feeble and pitiful. They scurry away frantically, in shame. They know they possess no glory like what is present. Even thoughts themselves seem subdued and timid. A fusion of one hundred million sensations all packed into the instant. The dance of Shiva. Colours, sounds, events. Frame by frame the universe unfolds. Now puts everything on a pedestal. Worships it. Proclaims it more holy than all. I celebrate this day, this moment. Needing nothing, wanting nothing. Everything contained within myself this very second. And suddenly I see it clearly. The kingdom is here this very instant. The kingdom I have sought so diligently is none other than my awakened consciousness. I have been at the steps of the kingdom all my life and knew it not. Contained in every second. Contained in every person. Our mortal eyes see it not, so preoccupied are we by day to day affairs, but spiritual senses, once awakened, fly to it like a bird to a nest. One enters the kingdom not through truths or teachings but moment-to-moment surrendering to the Mystery.

Chapter 22. All and Everything
I am the prism by which all is perceived. I need not change, make myself better or more beautiful - I have merely to behold myself as beautiful and it will be so. Ugly, it is so. Wondrous, it is so. Unworthy, it is so. All exists within. So it has been and will be forever more. And so I choose to behold myself and my life through the vision the GM has shown me. I will behold my life as glorious in sickness as well as health. In despair and in hope. In sadness and happiness. This will be my gift. This is my sacred song. To behold the wonder and glory - and to proclaim it loud and clear for all to hear. There is no greater honour than to honour myself. My life. All I can see and touch. Every person I meet. Each day becomes my miracle, simply because I live within the GM. The GM is there in all I do and experience. Each day becomes a tribute and a prayer and worship. Always together. Always one. Holy art thou, Mysterious One.

The Child

The Child
Blonde kid on a beach
Holding Mummy's sandal in my little hand
Mouth in an unrestrained smile of glee
Hat on head, feet in sand
Smiling at the camera
At Daddy
Who's been there
Since life began
Held me tentatively in his arms
And listened to my first garbled words
Dada! Dada!
And learning to crawl
Watch me crawl, dada!
Rising onto wobbly legs
His eyes watch me. What's behind them?
Unrestrained hugs of love? Whoops of joy at my achievements?
Does he hold me close to his heart and say special things
To his little son?
And do I want to impress him, make him proud, live to hear his praises?
Do I feel his pain? Do I feel his Wall?
Lonely, so lonely in the dark.
Do I try to climb it? Crawl under it?
Vulnerable. So vulnerable.
A little blonde son, with innocent eyes.
Green eyes. The same shade as his.
Trying so hard.
Do I feel his eyes on me - critical eyes?
Picking at my weakness.
Got to be perfect!
Caught in a circle of the past.
And future?
Do I feel his lighter sides too, his laughs and sparkles?
Every day, his presence moulds me.
Seeps into my soul.
The circle turns.
Or does it?

Written:  1997

Reflections from a deck chair

Oludeniz,  Turkey  1997

Reflections From A Deck Chair
I gaze into the sky below
stuck to the ceiling of the world
by an invisible force
that makes leaves fall in autumn,
breasts sag with age,
daredevils hurtle from planes,
water cascade into ravines,
chairs collapse under the fat,
snow avalanche from cliffs,
rain patter onto roofs,
and ostriches stay earthbound
as much as they might want to fly.

Written: 1997