Memorable moments: Selling beef to the French

I have had my fair share of challenging jobs over the years, but nothing quite compared to the sheer absurdity of the role I landed in London back in 1998.

Ally and I had been backpacking through Turkey, India, and Thailand. Our original plan was to continue onward to Indonesia, but widespread political riots erupted there just as we were starting to feel thoroughly traveled out. Since our flight home to Cape Town was booked for April, we decided to spend our remaining two months in England, dipping our toes into working life there to see how it felt.

Through an agency, I managed to secure a contract as a marketing consultant for the Ministry of Agriculture, Fisheries and Food. My office was located in Whitehall Place—a grand, imposing Victorian complex along the Embankment that made me feel like I had stepped right into the corridors of British power.

My primary assignment? Designing and coordinating marketing brochures aimed at promoting British beef to French consumers.

There was just one minor, colossal obstacle: Britain was right in the thick of the catastrophic BSE—or "Mad Cow Disease"—crisis.

The British beef industry was under a strict, blanket European export ban, and the French public was utterly terrified of the stuff. Trying to craft glossy, persuasive copy extolling the wholesome virtues of British cattle to Parisian shoppers while the global headlines screamed about apocalyptic brain disease was easily the most uphill marketing battle in human history. It was a masterclass in trying to sell ice to penguins—if the ice was also suspected of being radioactive.

Yet despite the sheer impossibility of the brief, I loved every minute of our time there. Navigating the Underground, soaking up the historic streets, and experiencing the pulse of London life completely won us over.

Those two chaotic, experimental months in Whitehall planted the seed that changed the course of our lives. They played a decisive role in our decision to move to the UK permanently in 2000, kicking off a vibrant six-year London chapter before our next great leap down under to Australia in 2006.

Whitehall Place where I worked